A Story they Won't Forget

The best way to be remembered,
Is to tell a story they won't forget.

I thought about this while fading asleep. It's aggrivating becoming brilliant with stories, poems, and words that flow effortessly through your head while trying to sleep. I don't ever have the energy to find a pen and write them all down. I'm halfway between reality whenever words come to me.

I always looks forward to my dreams. It's where I find the majority of my inspiration. I dream about silly meaningless things and some dreams that have all the meaning in the world. Some dreams I will never forget.

I look forward to stories, I don't know a person alive who doesn't. We find them in conversations, in books, in movies, in our daily routines, and so much more; stories are literally everywhere! As a writer, I have found wisdom in listening. If you're attentive, you will find gems for your writing. Even tonight, I overheard part of a story,

"The doorbell rang. I was sound asleep in bed, so I looked at my alarm clock - it was 2 o'clock in the morning. I thought I might be dreaming, but there it was again. I shakily put on a robe and went to the window, there wasn't a car in the driveway or a shadow on my porch. I began to wonder, who would be ringing my doorbell at a time like this?"

My husband said to me, "That was an interesting, wasn't it?"

"Yep," I replied. "It'd make an interesting story for a book!"

I am trying to become more alert for those gems to write in my journals or store in my head, because you never know what you'll find when you're listening.

I don't want this to sound vain, but someday, I would like to write a story they won't forget. I want to write a story like Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, or Rowling: stories that transported us to a world we wanted to be apart of. These writers have inspired me so much to be more. They will always be remembered as brilliant artists who navigated the words to worlds beyond our wildest dreams: who wouldn't want to go there? Who wouldn't want to do the same thing? Stories: the compass we hold in this life. I pray God gives me the inspiration and vision to put words on paper like that. For a story they won't forget.

Just Be

My Mother always told me that I could be whatever I wanted to be. I appreciate her confidence in me, I hope to pass that on to my own daughter.

However.

I do wish I didn't have a great deal of interests. I definitely believe I could do whatever I wanted to do, but where do I fit in best? What is my nitch in this life? What was I born to become?

The problem is, I am a dreamer and I have these awesome dreams - awesomely BIG dreams! Then the cycle begins:

I dream a dream!
I get excited and pursue that dream.
I tell myself, "Now, you're not to change course, you will not quit this time!"
And so I continue!
    And continue....
          and continue....       y  a  w  n

And suddenly realize, "Jeez! This isn't just any dream, this is really DIFFICULT!"
I begin to doubt, "Am I really that great at this?" ....probably not.
So out goes that dream and a new one must be born!

Because, God forbid I am ever bored.

I did this with a music career, an art career, a medical career, photography, I finally went to school for wedding consulting, but now even that dream is beginning to dim; because writing has come back with a vengeance. I'm torn. I can't have it all, can I?

Possibly.

I see this weakness in myself and I can't stand it, I despise it. To give up, to not see projects through. I am so indecisive and lost in this vertigo, "What do you want from life?" I don't know!

I don't know.

I suppose if I ponder that question, the answer is: I want to be successful. I want to be creative. I want to change minds, enlighten people. I want to live life to the fullest. I want to be remembered as a good mom and wife. I want to have great faith in my walk with Jesus Christ. I want to write, create, paint, sketch, sing, and read. I want to have it all and see my dreams through.

From beginning ---
to the end.

So when I become uneasy on rocky shores and begin to doubt if I can handle the pressure, I need to stand firm in that dream and know, "You can do this."

You can be whatever you want to be - just be.

Philippians 1:6
"Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a goodwork in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ."